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Happy 19th birthday! Here's a clogged up drain full of hair. It was
inevitable, the Marczika hair loss gene is hitting me a little early.
To give you some insight to the gravity of the situation, all three of
my uncles on my moms side are pretty much completely bald, and my mom
has very thin hair. The sad thing is that all of them began to loss
their hair in there early to mid 20s. Hooray for me, unsightliness is
right around the corner. If I'm lucky I can make it to 30 without
needing to buy a toupee and still walking without the aid of a cane. My
mom must have taken acid to complicate things during my pregnancy
because I ending up with all the shitty traits in my family. If only I
were more of a freak I could gang some celebrity like this super cool
guy. http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=5514804257
Party on Billie Simpson.
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| Everybody should be thanking me. I am here on this planet to take the
brunt of misplaced racial anger. Every minority hates me mainly because
I am a goofy looking white dude who wont really fight back, (note to
self: buy a knife). I feel I only come in second to cops because they
are mainly goofy looking white dudes in stupid uniforms. On a different
note, I've been starting some real bad habits lately. First smoking,
which is bad because...well duh, and golfing. Golfing is bad because it
is so expensive and you never really feel fulfilled after playing a
round. You either feel discouraged and play poorly and can't wait to
tear up the course next time, or you do well and well...you can't wait
to tear up the course next time. Golf is such a damn expensive hobby as
well. You buy a nice set of clubs which runs upwards of $400 and then
you have to buy green fees and all this other equipment. The best thing
about golf is playing with my dad, and I'll tell you why. He is so
frugal out on the links that he never uses his own tees. He scours the
ground looking for a half of a tee here and there.
"Wait look here's a full one! I can't believe someone just left it
here, wow look it even has a golf joke on the side. This must be some
lost treasure of some far off culture long since gone and forgotten.
And another one, this one is still reusable."
"Dad, that isn't even half a tee."
"Well I'm going to save it for the par three that is coming up."
"You do that dad."
It's like come on, they are like 4,000 for a dollar ease up on the tees
a bit. You just bought a 30 dollar green fee why don't you splurge and
go ahead and get a dozen tees for 3 cents.
Also, I decided I should just go ahead and be a psychologist, lots of
people want to talk to me about their problems and whatnot. I might as
well be charging them for my valuable time. That ends this episode of
"The Chronicles of a Bored G-man" tune in next time (or don't, I dont't
really give a fuck) when G-man encounters a girl. (should be a good
episode, set your TiVo)
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| I like to keep my options open to anything, seeing as I have no current plans with my life. I'm even against my will maintaining a steady path towrds a monk or any other clerical postions.
Play the lottery. | | |
| I am bored. I sit around all the time and play video games or waste
time on the internet. Hopefully I can get a job soon so my parents will
quit bugging me and I'll be earning some dough before the school year.
Enough about that, I was thinking today about how I want to spend a day
just kinda walking around with no purpose at all. I could go lean on a
wall by the liquor store or go to fuddruckers, or get tired of walking
and come back home. I mean think of the possibilities! Maybe that
wasn't thought out too well, but sometimes I like not having a plan for
the day. But maybe not having a plan is having a plan. Either way
tropical skittles are good, especially the mystery flavored white ones.
I just remembered something funny Bort's sister pointed out to me a
long while ago. How in the popular mexican restaraunt chain
Lolita's has deemed on its daily special menu the choice of certain
"tacos". "tacos"? Well are they tacos or egg salad? Correct me if I'm
wrong but I'm pretty sure tacos were a defintive term, not subject to
change by Lolita's or without the expressed written consent of
Major League Baseball.
I also am becoming fearful whenever in public due to the extreme
popularity of reality shows. Who knows when or where you might be
struck by a reality TV show. For example, my friend Miguel is in the
hospital from a severe reality show mishap which ended up with him
being filmed on the Real World San Diego, was Punk'd by Ashton Kutcher,
and then Joe Rogan made him eat inanimate objects. He hasn't been the
same since. TV needs to know its place, on sets and not on the streets
harming innocent unknowing normal people.
I dare you to make sense of anything I just said. In fact, I'll double dare you or you can take the physical challenge.
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| Knock, knock.
Who's there?
First entry.
First entry who?
The End | | |
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